Family Joy

Hi cyberspace. I've had lots of thoughts swirling around my head about family and happiness and I thought I'd share. I have to be honest, I have a really hard time sharing my heart on the internet. But I think it's important to show positive, honest views about family living because often only the sad, hard stuff gets attention. Please though, if you feel like throwing rotten tomatoes at me after reading, just don't. Because I'm really sensitive and heaven knows my husband has to deal with enough of my emotions.  

Today in Relief Society (a meeting in church for the women) my sweet friend gave a lesson about two of my favorite talks from last April's General Conference. The talks were Elder Christofferson's "Why Marriage? Why Family"  and Sister Burton's "We'll Ascend Together". I loved the lesson and discussion we had. You have to understand, I LOVE thinking, talking about, studying, and learning about the importance of family and family dynamics. I am honored to be a wife and mother and I hope to be a marriage and family therapist someday. Strengthening the institution of family is my passion because I truly believe that all of society's great problems could be solved if everybody had a strong, committed family they belonged to. So needless to say, I had to sit on my hands and bite my tongue to keep from talking too much during the lesson. I am proud to say that I limited myself to one comment, which is saying something, because I sure know how to talk.

Anyways...I love the family. I know it is a divine institution and that our happiness as children of God is intricately tied to our commitment to our relationships with each other. The Lord has given us the doctrines and principles we need to have strong families. It is from being committed to each other and Christ that the deepest desires of our hearts--to be truly loved, honored, known, and cherished---can be reached.

That being said, though we have been given a picture of what the ideal family situation looks like I think it's so important to realize that NO FAMILY IS ANYWHERE NEAR PERFECT. Maybe you didn't have parents who were committed to each other or you. Maybe you have a spouse or child who has hurt your deeply. Maybe, for whatever reason, you've been denied family relationships that you so desperately want. Maybe you have family members who have severely abused you. Or perhaps, you have an "ideal" family situation but struggle with the various human weaknesses of your family members. The thing is, everybody has something within their family that is brilliantly hard. But that's OK because we have a Savior.

Jesus Christ's Atonement can overcome any struggle you or your family is experiencing. It doesn't matter what it is, He is there. His grace is sufficient, He is ready to help. As we make and keep covenants with Him, regardless of where our family members are in their relationship with Him, our lives and the lives of our loved ones are blessed. We are more sensitive to His promptings and our capacity to do good is increased.

Trust in Him. Pattern your life after His and trust that He has the answers to your honest questions, concerns, and fears. Sometimes we get too concerned with the task lists of "righteous" living. We become like the Pharisees of old who were perfect at marking off boxes, but didn't see their Savior, though He stood right there. I loved President Uchtdorf's reminder to the women last Saturday that in the end, the gospel of Jesus Christ centers around love. Love for the Savior, and love for each other. Everything we do is about growing the love we have in our hearts for Him, and increasing our desire to be more like Him.

So what does this have to do with families? Family life is hard. There have been many moments where I've honestly asked God why this has to be so hard. But I've learned that as I choose to have faith, I am supplied with hope and can better see the good in my life. And when I focus on this good, I recognize the hand of God. I feel more inspired in how to do this holy work. And I know I'm not alone. So trust in Him, and rather than turning to Facebook, Instagram, chocolate cake, or worldly accolades for validation turn to Him. He will help, He can help bring peace to any storm. And I am so grateful for that. This is something I struggle with everyday, but I'm committed to keep trying. So join me! Because it's so much easier to do things together!

The world will find peace as we accept Him as our good shepherd and learn to love each other and ourselves as He does. Our families will be blessed, and we will find the joy our heart yearns for.